Do You Seek Positive Conclusions to Perceived Negativity in Negotiations

Perceived negativity occurs in every negotiation, but is perceived negativity negative in a negotiation? It doesn’t have to be. Perceived negativity does occur in every negotiation. If it doesn’t, you nor the other negotiators are negotiating effectively. When perceived negativity occurs in your negotiations, how do you control it and what tactics do you employ to do so. Consider the following situations and the embedded opportunities in them.

1. If you’re outnumbered and feel disadvantaged, consider ways in which you could benefit from it. As an example, if you live in a setting where people smoke and you can’t prevent them from doing so, you might consider having cigarettes on hand and selling them at a marked up price. Grant it, the problem of preventing them from smoking would not be solved, but at least you’d profit financially from their disapproving ways. In essence, in your negotiations, when you encounter negativity, seek ways to take lemons and turn them into lemonade.

2. Hypothetically, you own the last three Picasso paintings in the world. When viewing the paintings, someone accidentally slips. While trying to catch their balance, they rip one of the paintings. One way to view this occurrence is from the perspective of having one of your paintings having lost its value. Another way to view it is from the perspective that the other two Picassos are now worth more. In your negotiations, frame negative situations to appear in their best possible light. Negativity doesn’t have to be viewed as being negative, unless that perspective serves your position. If it doesn’t serve your position, highlight the positive.

3. Negativity in a negotiation can be beneficial, but only to the degree that it’s felt. If you stress a potential negative outcome, from the perspective of how the other negotiator will be impaired if it occurs and she can’t ‘feel’ or experience that negativity, it will not be received with the same level of ‘realism’ as if it had occurred. When speaking of negativity, if you wish to highlight the potential downfall of not taking one path over another, or addressing a situation sooner versus later, cite ‘real life’ experiences that had the most horrid outcomes to heighten your point. To enrich your point, verbally paint ghoulish pictures that are as reprehensible as you can conjure.

Remember as you negotiate, your mental perception controls what is negative and that which is positive. Thus, if you control the perception of negativity during negotiations and focus on the outcome you seek, you can frame and control the flow of a negotiation. Once you become adept at doing so, you’ll begin to view perceived negativity in a new light. You may even come to appreciate and seek perceived negative situations in negotiations, because you’ll know how to use such situations to assist you in your efforts… and everything will be right with the world.

The Negotiation Tips Are…

· When negotiating, as in all phases of life, negativity begins in your mind. During negotiations, when accessing perceived negative situations, give thought to the benefits they could conceal. By doing so, you may surprise yourself by uncovering a diamond that first appeared to be coal.

· When you negotiate and you’re beset by negativity, display an even disposition. Don’t bemoan negativity to the degree that you allow it to take you ‘off your game’. As a cliché advises, ‘never let them see you sweat’.

· In a negotiation, you reach major milestones by achieving mile-pebbles. Be persistent in your attempts to achieve the goal of your negotiation and don’t be dismayed by negativity.

Serious Common Mistakes in a Presentation

There is a serious common mistake made by salespeople during presentations that happens way too often. It involves starting right into the presentation without first establishing a few things. A presentation done properly consists of at least 4 parts.

First, establish rapport and a reasonably high level of trust.

Second, spend the time to clearly identify the problems and needs of your prospect.

Third, give your presentation.

The last part is the close itself.

These parts are not established in stone somewhere, you must be flexible. Every time you ask a question, your presentation and steps may change just a little, even though the goal is always the same.

Let me explain. Your presentation is really an entire closing process. Once you have established some kind of common ground and trust, you begin to ask questions trying to uncover their ‘hot’ buttons. You always remain alert to the answers given to find out what they are really concerned about. These answers may change your presentation’s emphasis on certain solutions that your product or service may solve.

At every step of the way, you want to restate the problem or goal as you understand it to gain their approval. In fact, the best way to begin the formal part of your presentation is the restate the problem or goal that you and your prospect have mutually identified. This is critical to your success. You are trying to present a solution to a problem they have, not one you think they have.

Then you move from the general to the particular. Again, it’s important that you ask questions along the way to gain agreement. “How does this sound to you?” “Does this make sense to you so far?” You see, this is really just a trial close.

If you remember, a trial close is a series of questions designed to get agreement along the way so that when you actually ask for the order or begin writing the order, it makes total sense. They have agreed with you all along, if they agreed with everything, there is no reason that they shouldn’t move ahead.

Today, I just want you to start thinking of your presentations as a closing process, not just telling your prospects about yourself and your company. The whole process may take several visits, but the end result of any presentation process should be walking away with an order in your hands.

If you haven’t established good rapport and a reasonably high level of trust and spent the time to clearly identify the problems and needs of your prospect before you launch into your presentation, you’ll be trying to close them on a solution that solves a problem they don’t have. You will have started your closing procedure way too soon.

Presenting Yourself With Confidence – How to Break Out of Your Shell

Imagine a royal court. You have the king, the dukes, the prince, the peasants and everyone in-between. Each of us has the equivalent to a royal court that resides in our heads. We populate the roles of the court with people we know and ourselves. Depending on our role and depending on the role of whomever it is we are interacting with, we act differently. Daily interactions always go through this thought process. If you’ve given yourself the role of peasant, you will always be expecting people to put you down. If, however, you’ve given yourself the role of a king, you don’t expect to ever be put down. The way one views oneself has been influenced by a myriad of factors, but most importantly by the people one surrounds oneself by. The trick to the whole game of life is figuring out which role you’ve given yourself and deciding if that’s the role you want to have. You can choose any role you want, but whatever role you choose becomes your reality.

When someone treats you in a way that isn’t congruent with your self-assigned role, your ego get’s shaken. You can physically feel the effects when that happens. That’s called “fight or flight.” I’m sure you’ve heard of it. I just find it amazing that the body reacts as if it is in physical danger when the ego is rattled.

The word “ego” has to be the most misused word in the English language. It’s been associated with “megalomania,” “vanity,” and a bunch of other negative concepts. According to Freud, it actually just represents the conscious, instead of the unconscious, mind. If a challenge to the conscious mind causes a physical reaction, it stands to reason that you can control the physical world through your conscious thoughts. I could take it a step further and posit that you must change your thoughts before you can change your physical reality. If we consider this as truth, then we aren’t reacting to our environments, we are creating them!

Once, I walked into a friend’s house that needed to be cleaned badly. His name is Charlie. I wouldn’t say he was up to hoarder status, but he definitely needed a hand. I realized that I could help change the situation in that house; and, without sounding condescending; I offered to hire Charlie a maid service. The thought of a maid service coming in to help clean up bothered Charlie to the point of physical agitation. Why would somebody with a dirty house be so against a paid maid service? I would have loved such a luxury.

The answer to that riddle lies in the internal role my friend has given himself… not exactly king. My offer to have a paid service come and clean things challenged his role, thereby challenging his ego, and causing him physical discomfort. Having a maid come in and clean would mean that the role he had given himself was false… that he wasn’t privileged enough to have a service like that. These are the types of life changing thought processes that need to be considered when attempting to unlock your inner swag. Have you given yourself the wrong role? Are you a peasant or are you upwardly mobile? If you’ve given yourself the wrong role, you need to change it and now.

If Charlie had already made the conscious decision to change the way he views himself in relation to his environment, he wouldn’t have resisted the notion of having a paid maid service come in and clean. He would have already been agitated at the sight of such a dirty house and would have been waiting for the opportunity to gather enough resources to get it fixed up. If he had done the internal work before the chance presented itself, he would have been able to benefit from it. If he previously visualized a clean house, it would have actualized at that moment. Daydreaming is, therefore, productive. Dream your reality into existence.

Some people just aren’t ready to view the world in a different way than they always have and they miss out on life because of it. Charlie could have challenged his own ego and upgraded his environment; but instead chose the lazy route and stayed in his comfort zone. It’s much better to step outside of the comfort zone, even if it means asking for help or thinking of oneself in a different light. To do it any other way is to cheat oneself. Do not wait around to be swallowed up by an environment you’ve created. That’s never a good look.

Ask yourself, “What role have I given myself?” You are not your role. You never were. You never will be. Your role is just a hat you wear, that’s all. Becoming the best person you can possibly be involves assessing your perspective. You can’t become the person you want to be if you don’t start with a basic understanding of who you are. Just like a general going to war against an enemy, you must assess the obstacles that stand in the way of you unlocking your personal potential. The first of those obstacles is your ego.

Everyone has doubts and insecurities about themselves… some are natural, but most are shaped by those around us. The art of finding yourself in all of that involves, oddly enough, finding yourself in those around you. People project their own insecurities onto you. You absorb those interactions and then they become a part of your personality. You really are the sum of the people around you. They help shape the way you view yourself and the way you view the world. You are the flesh and blood representation of all the thoughts, emotions, and views you have absorbed from those around you.

It’s important to be conscious about which notions you allow yourself to absorb and which you allow to “pass.” Once you allow a certain belief to enter your mind and become a fixture, you will begin to mirror that belief and your entire reality will bend in order to make room for it. Renovating your house of cards is just as time-consuming and uncomfortable as renovating your physical house. It hurts, but that’s the only way to truly grow.